Endings and Beginnings

I will not be at the market this afternoon, as I am getting ready for a trip to Southwest Minnesota.  I’ll be checking in with PrairieSun to see if they need a load of veggies at their shop–the gardens no doubt need harvesting before I leave!

After close to a year since I filed for a change of primary custody for M (a long year of preparation and work and worry), we had our hearing in court yesterday.  We lost.  In custody changes, the parent asking for the change has to present a very strong burden of evidence that the change is needed.

We knew it was an uphill battle, but we tried, and that is what really counts.  Thankfully, once and for all, the judge dismissed my ex’s long-running assertions that I just “took off” and that I “abandoned” my child.  No one believed that, but not for his lack of trying.

I’ll freely admit that I got angry on the stand and shamed him for it. And I don’t for a moment regret it.  The weird thing was, though I had already realized what the verdict would be, and had nodded “no” to H, who was standing outside, it was my ex who walked out of the courtroom visibly agitated.

I won’t hazard a guess on why he was upset to have won, but when we walked outside, his current wife and mother-in-law were nowhere to be seen (perhaps in their lawyer’s office), and he was sitting all alone under a tree across the road, playing his mandolin.  Yep, that’s my ex.

Though we were not successful in the hearing, parenting is about the long haul, and I’ll continue being the best mom I can be.  The hearing is over, but the care and love and support I give my son is forever.

The reason for the Minnesota trip this weekend is that I have applied for a Local Foods Organizing position in Big Stone County, and I’ll be interviewed for that position tomorrow.

It looks like an awesome opportunity to practice the skills I’ve learned over the last decade here in Vermillion and South Dakota as a whole–expanding access and awareness of local foods, helping connect producers to consumers and to institutions as well.  And to do what I love to do–what I’m driven to do–in a professional capacity.

As the kids say, “How cool is that?”

Besides being an incredible opportunity to do what I love, it would put me two hours closer to where my son currently resides with his dad–cutting the commute time to one hour instead of three.

With the stars aligning like that, there was no way I wasn’t going to apply.

I have kept this application under my hat for the most part, so I expect it is a surprise to some readers. I simply did not want to try answering questions about logistics of a job I haven’t got yet and a move I haven’t planned yet–and certainly not before the custody hearing, where my attention needed to be focused.

So, I’ll let you know how it goes, and if the stars really do align, we’ll talk about logistics then.  I’m heading up to the interview tomorrow morning, and will stay with friends in Milbank that night.  I plan to hit the Ortonville Farmers Market on Saturday morning before I leave, and am hoping to see my son on the return trip as well.

Please wish me luck and love!


5 responses to this post.

  1. Oof. Tough news on the court hearing.

    But good luck with the job interview — it sounds like a great position!

  2. Posted by Heidi on July 29, 2010 at 8:33 am

    Super exciting news about the job interview (it’s with LSP, isn’t it?)! Hope you gave the name of someone from DRA as a reference. We can provide a glowing recommendation. Best of luck! I like Ortonville and have been to their little Farmers Market. Have fun.

  3. Posted by flyingtomato on July 29, 2010 at 9:33 am

    Yes, it’s with LSP–awesome position with an awesome organization! Frank said he’d be “honored” to have me use his name as a reference. 🙂

  4. Posted by Mary on July 29, 2010 at 10:04 am

    We’ll certainly miss you if you take the position. You’ve brought SD and the Vermillion and surrounding areas such amazing energy and provided us with so much life-sustaining information. I, for one, will miss your presence and blog deeply.


  5. Posted by tuliplady on August 1, 2010 at 12:50 pm

    Been reading your blog for awhile (love it btw), but never commented.
    I sympathize with your custody case as I have been through the same thing.
    Good luck with the job interview. 🙂

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